I Used to Love Lightning

When Raven and I were together, we fell in love with Lightning. I say we did, but not totally, I don't think. But we both loved her, and that enabled the threesome thing to happen. That's what did it for me: I loved her. Now, Olive wants a threesome. I don't know if I can. It was different with Raven, because I knew he loved me. I wasn't afraid of losing him to another woman, I guess is what I'm saying. Olive already HAS another woman, and I don't love him. I like him a lot, might even consider dating him if it weren't for his "girlfriend". But love isn't a factor. It took me so long to be able to fck without love, to be able to have truly no-strings sex. With men. Will I be able to with a woman? Do I even want to try? I tried with Raven out of love. For Olive's curiousity and descent into depravity, just WHAT am I willing (and/or able) to do?
Raven wanted me to beat her, Lightning. I couldn't. I'm a sub; it pains me to see others in pain, especially to be causing it. No matter how much he said that it was still submitting because it was his order...I didn't. Submit to THAT, motherfcker.
Yes, I know that was completely pointless. So?
Laters