Well, Slate is home. Which is why I haven't been blogging as much-he's been on the computer nearly the entire time he's been back. But we're getting along-all day we've been playing Super Mario World. In which he sucks and I rock. Except for air worlds. Anything involving the high possibility of me falling to my doom makes me cringe-and suck major ass. But other than that, I rock.
Hmmmm...other news...Amethyst has been TOO full of energy today. I was going to take her to the park, but it was all rainy and gloomy so we ended up just staying in. I really should take her to the beach. Or something like that. She's so sweet, she needs to get out more. Maybe I'm just a horrible mother. Mother. Wow. I'm a mother. Who'd've thunk? Okay, we're not counting those teachers in high school who placed bets that I'd get pregnant right away. Those guys are flukes, I say. But they all love my daughter...
Anyway, I'm in not a shitty mood today. A little bit of wanting to destroy all humanity, but not entirely.
I still haven't talked to my knight. I suppose it WAS just me who felt that way. Or maybe he did, too, but chose to forget. Or maybe he let the physical aspects-at least what I told him-obscure the whole picture. Or maybe he got caught up in his life and hasn't had time to get to a computer. Or maybe he was just a player and a liar. Or maybe something terrible happened to him. Or maybe he found someone else, that lives closer. Or maybe...I don't know. I have no idea why he's chosen to go this long without any contact. He promised he wouldn't let it go more than two days-four at the most. And as if that wasn't enough, he's not only NOT emailed me, he hasn't responded to MY email. I know it wasn't my imagination. But maybe everyone else is right-maybe it's not possible to find that, what I thought we had. And maybe he'll email me tomorrow telling me just how sorry he is and the circumstances under which he's been detained. Am I foolish to hope for that? And is anyone surprised to find that that's the only thing I'm hoping for? And will anyone be surprised to find I'm disappointed again? Why do I keep hoping for this? For anything? Hasn't the world/ universe/ multiverse/ whatever given me enough proof that it not only hates humanity, but also has a personal vendatta against me? Yes, yes it has. I suppose I'm just slow to take the hint. As hoping and looking and wishing for my knight is slow to take the hint that he no longer finds me necessary. If he ever did.
I'm drinking an Amaretto Sour. It tastes yummy and good and super alcoholic. Maybe I CAN make it through another night alone.
Laters
Hmmmm...other news...Amethyst has been TOO full of energy today. I was going to take her to the park, but it was all rainy and gloomy so we ended up just staying in. I really should take her to the beach. Or something like that. She's so sweet, she needs to get out more. Maybe I'm just a horrible mother. Mother. Wow. I'm a mother. Who'd've thunk? Okay, we're not counting those teachers in high school who placed bets that I'd get pregnant right away. Those guys are flukes, I say. But they all love my daughter...
Anyway, I'm in not a shitty mood today. A little bit of wanting to destroy all humanity, but not entirely.
I still haven't talked to my knight. I suppose it WAS just me who felt that way. Or maybe he did, too, but chose to forget. Or maybe he let the physical aspects-at least what I told him-obscure the whole picture. Or maybe he got caught up in his life and hasn't had time to get to a computer. Or maybe he was just a player and a liar. Or maybe something terrible happened to him. Or maybe he found someone else, that lives closer. Or maybe...I don't know. I have no idea why he's chosen to go this long without any contact. He promised he wouldn't let it go more than two days-four at the most. And as if that wasn't enough, he's not only NOT emailed me, he hasn't responded to MY email. I know it wasn't my imagination. But maybe everyone else is right-maybe it's not possible to find that, what I thought we had. And maybe he'll email me tomorrow telling me just how sorry he is and the circumstances under which he's been detained. Am I foolish to hope for that? And is anyone surprised to find that that's the only thing I'm hoping for? And will anyone be surprised to find I'm disappointed again? Why do I keep hoping for this? For anything? Hasn't the world/ universe/ multiverse/ whatever given me enough proof that it not only hates humanity, but also has a personal vendatta against me? Yes, yes it has. I suppose I'm just slow to take the hint. As hoping and looking and wishing for my knight is slow to take the hint that he no longer finds me necessary. If he ever did.
I'm drinking an Amaretto Sour. It tastes yummy and good and super alcoholic. Maybe I CAN make it through another night alone.
Laters
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