"Tell me who should I be to make you love me
Tell me what does it mean to be alone
Can't you see me standing staring out from the distance
Hear my cry if you'd only listen
Out of focus into me and you
Kiss me fool, if you care
if your words have any meaning
Playing it cool is so unfair
Why this veil of secrecy
God forbid your friends found out what we did
Why can't someone like you be with someone like me
Tell me who should I be to make you love me
Tell me what does it mean to be alone
Can't you see me standing staring out from the distance,
Hear my cry if you'd only listen
Out of focus into me and you
Touch me fool, if you're allowed
I'll be dancing in the corner
It's so cruel to play it proud
Take your hands and cover me
I'm aware that all in love is fair
But that's no reason to make me feel this way
Tell me who should I be to make you love me
Tell me what does it mean to be alone
Can't you see me standing staring out from the distance
Hear my cry if you'd only listen
Out of focus into me and you.
And it hurts me so bad to deny it,
These feelings are out of control
Do you know what it's like to want something so bad
And then having to let it go
And it hurts me to know that this time in our lives
So soon will be in the past
And you spend it pretending and playing it cool
Never knowing
Never knowing
Never knowing what
What we should have had
Tell me who should I be to make you love me
Tell me what does it mean to be alone
You've got me wondering if I'm good enough
Pretty enough
Giving enough
Special enough
Tell me who should I be to make you love me
Who should I be
Who should I be
To make you love me
Who should I be
Who should I be
To make you love me
Who should I be
Who should I be
To make you love me"
Goddammit. Things are so fucking screwy right now. I love her SO FUCKING MUCH. And she worse than ignores me-she treats me as if I am the root of all that is evil in her life. Yet I'm the one willing to forgive, to share, to love, to be with her for always. Even now, Raven's up there. Why? Because I asked Him to go, to be with her, listen to her, comfort her. I asked Him to do this because I cannot. It should be my arms around her, my shoulder soaked with her tears. *sigh* Even in that I suppose I'm selfish: I want to be the one she turns to, I want to be there for her, I want her to trust me, love me. Goddammit, I want to give her everything. And all I want from her-ever-is love, attention. Maybe every now and then a tattoo, but only if she wants to, it would never be a requirement, never a demand.
I miss her. I feel as if I finally found the last part of me only to have it ripped away again. With her, with Him, with the two of them, I felt WHOLE. Now I have Him and while what we have is...I dunno, good I guess, all I can think about is her. I send Him up there, think of things to do for her (through Him, of course), try to help her, offer whatever meager services I am capable of rendering. I feel helpless, knowing I can do nothing to change her mind, knowing that all I can do is hope and wait and love and miss and cry sometimes.
Who SHOULD I be? Tell me and I will. Anything, anyone, everything, whatever you want I'll do, say, be. I love you. I miss you. And you don't even know. You'll never read this, never know how much you mean to me. You'll just wander around oblivious to the pain I'd gladly bear a thousand times over if only I had any assurance that in the end you'd see me, love me, be with me. Tell me. I'm yours. But you'll never know.
Laters
Tell me what does it mean to be alone
Can't you see me standing staring out from the distance
Hear my cry if you'd only listen
Out of focus into me and you
Kiss me fool, if you care
if your words have any meaning
Playing it cool is so unfair
Why this veil of secrecy
God forbid your friends found out what we did
Why can't someone like you be with someone like me
Tell me who should I be to make you love me
Tell me what does it mean to be alone
Can't you see me standing staring out from the distance,
Hear my cry if you'd only listen
Out of focus into me and you
Touch me fool, if you're allowed
I'll be dancing in the corner
It's so cruel to play it proud
Take your hands and cover me
I'm aware that all in love is fair
But that's no reason to make me feel this way
Tell me who should I be to make you love me
Tell me what does it mean to be alone
Can't you see me standing staring out from the distance
Hear my cry if you'd only listen
Out of focus into me and you.
And it hurts me so bad to deny it,
These feelings are out of control
Do you know what it's like to want something so bad
And then having to let it go
And it hurts me to know that this time in our lives
So soon will be in the past
And you spend it pretending and playing it cool
Never knowing
Never knowing
Never knowing what
What we should have had
Tell me who should I be to make you love me
Tell me what does it mean to be alone
You've got me wondering if I'm good enough
Pretty enough
Giving enough
Special enough
Tell me who should I be to make you love me
Who should I be
Who should I be
To make you love me
Who should I be
Who should I be
To make you love me
Who should I be
Who should I be
To make you love me"
Goddammit. Things are so fucking screwy right now. I love her SO FUCKING MUCH. And she worse than ignores me-she treats me as if I am the root of all that is evil in her life. Yet I'm the one willing to forgive, to share, to love, to be with her for always. Even now, Raven's up there. Why? Because I asked Him to go, to be with her, listen to her, comfort her. I asked Him to do this because I cannot. It should be my arms around her, my shoulder soaked with her tears. *sigh* Even in that I suppose I'm selfish: I want to be the one she turns to, I want to be there for her, I want her to trust me, love me. Goddammit, I want to give her everything. And all I want from her-ever-is love, attention. Maybe every now and then a tattoo, but only if she wants to, it would never be a requirement, never a demand.
I miss her. I feel as if I finally found the last part of me only to have it ripped away again. With her, with Him, with the two of them, I felt WHOLE. Now I have Him and while what we have is...I dunno, good I guess, all I can think about is her. I send Him up there, think of things to do for her (through Him, of course), try to help her, offer whatever meager services I am capable of rendering. I feel helpless, knowing I can do nothing to change her mind, knowing that all I can do is hope and wait and love and miss and cry sometimes.
Who SHOULD I be? Tell me and I will. Anything, anyone, everything, whatever you want I'll do, say, be. I love you. I miss you. And you don't even know. You'll never read this, never know how much you mean to me. You'll just wander around oblivious to the pain I'd gladly bear a thousand times over if only I had any assurance that in the end you'd see me, love me, be with me. Tell me. I'm yours. But you'll never know.
Laters
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