I've always revelled in my feminity, celebrated the fact that I'm a woman, that I have the power. And now I feel as if that power has been ripped away from me, stolen by an incompetent little shit with poor social skills.
It was different the last time-I still had the power because it never happened. Or at least might not have. Introducing that shred of doubt that enables me to tell myself stories. This time it's more than real, a nightmare more vividly remembered than my present environment is seen.
I feel as if I were stolen and there's nothing that can be done to get me back (though it's not as if I am worth mourning). And I don't know how to recreate myself, to forge a new me. And even if I do figure that out I don't think it would be worth the effort.
Does anyone ever heal from this shit?
Laters