I want him to love me. Raven. I want him to love me and to suffer because I don't-won't and can't-love him back. Does he? Yes, I think so. More than he admits, that's for damned sure. But I want more. I want him to be in love with me. ME, not this fantasy recreation of an old flame. And I want him to look in my eyes every day and see that his love is unrequited. And I want it to tear at him, to eat him up, to hurt him. And I want him to see how I suffer with him there, how I barely tolerate his presence, and I want that to hurt him, too. I want him to hurt because I'm hurting and to hurt more because he thinks he is the cause of it. Not physical pain, that's inconsequential. Even I can handle physical pain. No, I want to put him through the kind of torment that drives a man insane. The kind that rots his very being, his soul if he's got one. I want to destroy him. All the while having him thinking that he's getting what he wants, when really he'll only be getting what he deserves. I deserve it, too. To be cruel, viscious. To take what I want and give nothing in return. To use instead of being used. To punish him for all the wrongs any man has ever done me. And all the perceived wrongs as well. And believe me, I can perceive an injustice done me just about anywhere. And I usually do. So anyway. Time to make this bastard suffer. My way.
Any tips?
Laters