Women can be so dense sometimes. That's the way we are, I guess. We create a relationship where none exists, holding out hope for the impossible. Or maybe just me again. There isn't a shred of intimicy between me and Blonde. None. No affection, no emotion even. Nothing. Just sex. Really, REALLY good sex, but that's it. And, despite my protestations to the contrary, up until tonight I was trying to make it something more. Create in it a closeness that didn't exist. But tonight...tonight we had a mini adventure. We went to get an air mattress-he just got a new apartment, and while he has it all to himself, there's nothing in it-and he forgot to get batteries for the pump. So what did he decide to do? Was it...go get batteries? No, of course not. He decided to fill it with water. Which we endeavored to do for about an hour and it was still barely there. But the whole time we were trying this futile thing, there was no touching, no holding, no carressing, no even talking, really. And afterwards there was just sex. We didn't even kiss at all, all night long. I guess it's good to know that for absolutely sure now. But, it's kinda like killing the last of my hope. Lots of things are killing it recently. Stormy's right, though. I just can't quit.
Laters