All right, so another bizarre dating story has been requested. Or maybe I just feel like telling another one, you'll never know. Okay, this was more than a month ago. So I'm kind of restricted to my house because of my child-and on a side note, her colour is amethyst purple, and I'm going to refer to people I've already introduced by their colours (easier that way-for me at least). So Amethyst goes to bed and he comes over. We'll assign his colour as carrot. Okay, Carrot brings a movie-"Resident Evil", which I haven't seen before. Again, with the pretending to be scared-he takes my hand and puts it thisclose to his dick, pretending this is the most natural thing in the world, holding my hand. I don't care; he's not trying anything, really. And we watch and finish the movie, all the while he's holding my hand on his inner thigh. As soon as the movie's over-and I mean, the credits have barely started to roll, he sticks his fingers in my mouth. Whatever, they're clean and I have an oral fixation. Apparently he's fascinated with my tongue piercing. I finally get his fingers out of there and he CRAWLS ON TOP OF ME and starts kissing me. Again, whatever, I'm a big makeout whore-all about the kisses. Wanna guess what he's REALLY trying to do? That's right, he's trying to put his crotch in my face. I'm sure he's thinking I just won't be able to resist the temptation and will pull his pants down and suck him off right away. I deliberately don't get the hint. He is not discouraged by this, however. I ask him to leave and he ASKS ME FOR A BLOW JOB. Just comes right out, that bluntly. I kid you not. I say "no." I'm already appaled, and he actually asks "why not?" My first impulse? "Because I have the world's worst gag reflex, and if you stick that thing in my mouth, I'm going to vomit on it." What I actually said? "Because I don't want to. Now leave." And I shoved him out the door-where he stood until I got him his movie. I was tempted to just slam it in his face and throw the movie off the balcony, but I got it for him and he left. Because that's the kind of person I am.
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